Parenting across borders reshapes us—identity, pace, expectations, all of it. In this conversation, Mickelle welcomes parenting educator and Aware Parenting coach Maria Bordallo (Mama Maria), founder of Amsterdam’s Baby Fair. After a high-impact career with the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation, Maria turned toward the most intimate arena of change: secure attachment at home. Her blend of epigenetics, neurobiology, 12‑step wisdom, and gentle, practical guidance is the elegant toolkit expat families have been craving.

They talk about why so many of us “start fresh” abroad only to bump into the same patterns—and how awareness, attunement, and permission to be imperfect unlock a different path. Maria reminds us that our nervous system sets the tone; co-regulation is the true luxury our children need, especially in the first year. She also shares clear steps for those without built-in village support.

In this episode:

• Good enough parenting: preparation and repair over perfection. You will mess up; repair is the magic.
• The expat lens: “Wherever you go, there you are.” Migration can disguise old dynamics—awareness keeps you honest.
• Nervous system basics: co-regulation first (don’t leave babies to cry alone). Your regulation informs theirs.
• Six “don’ts” of dysfunction: don’t trust, don’t feel, don’t tell, don’t talk, don’t repair, don’t see. Naming them changes the script.
• Boundaries and expectations: lower the “hardware store for milk” hopes when visiting family; shorten stays, create neutral spaces, protect peace.
• Three pillars for internationals: build community intentionally, ask for and pay for help without guilt, and invest in your own recovery and well-being.

Why it matters for globally mobile families

• Without extended family nearby, your “village” must be designed. That design—plus regulated caregivers—creates the deepest sense of home for third-culture kids.
• Cities and companies benefit from regulated families; wellbeing is a public good.

Resources and links

• Mama Maria (Instagram: @mamamariacoach)
• Baby Fair Amsterdam (October; 2‑for‑1 tickets): https://www.mamamariacoach.com/events/bbabby-fair

Loved this episode? Share it with a fellow Peregrine, follow the show, and leave a rating. Ready to take one elegant step? Book your Baby Fair tickets, schedule an hour of care for yourself, or line up help for next week. Your nervous system is the family’s North Star.

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